Part 3

VI.

The Chestnut Tree was almost empty. I sat in my usual corner by the poster of Big Brother. The telescreen suddenly announced to listen in at fifteen thirty. I had a feeling that is was bad news about the disputed territories. Then I saw her not ten meters away. I got up and followed her. She had changed, there was a scar on her face but it was covered by her hair, and her waist had grown bigger. When we finally talked, we said we had betrayed each other but it doesn't matter because in the face of terror, you only care about yourself. And now neither of us think the same of each other or ever will again. Suddenly a trumpet had pierced the air. It was the bulletin. The trumpet meant victory. And victory it was. We had take control of all of Africa and brought the war closer to its end. I stared up at the picture of Big Brother. He had done this. I had come to love Big Brother.

Part 3

V.

I was led into a room where I was strapped upright in a chair with two tables in front of me. O'Brien came in and told me that Room 101 is the worst thing in the world. At that moment, two guards came in, one carrying a cage with probably an unimaginable horror in it. O'Brien says the worst thing in the world varies from person to person. I my case the worst thing in the world is rats. That is what is in the cage in front of me. I tried desperately to not meet my fate. I asked what I must do but O'Brien just inches the cage closer to my face. I am at the point of desperation now! There is only one way I can get out of this treatment. I must betray the one I love. Without much thought, I yell: "Do it to Julia! Do it to Julia! Not me! Julia! I don't care what you do to her. Tear her face off, strip her to the bones. Not me! Julia! Not me!" I heard the cage door click closed. I was safe.

Part 3

IV.

Prison life became much better, they fixed me up with a new pair of overalls, new teeth, frequent meals and even warm water to bathe with. They had replaced my diary after I was captured and I took it and started writing. I wrote three things: Freedom is Slavery, Two and Two make Five, and God is Power. I accepted everything now. Oceania was at war with Eurasia, it had always been. Jones, Aaronson, and Rutherford were guilty of the crimes they committed. The past is alterable. I knew I would be killed soon. I didn't know when it would come, but I imagined myself walking down a hallway and just being shot in the back of the head. O'Brien entered my room, and told me to come to him. He tells me that there is little wrong with me intellectually, but I have failed emotionally. He asks me how I feel towards Big Brother. I said I hated him. He said that was good. I fail to see the goos side of that. But I must love him. I must go to Room 101.

Part 3

III.

O'Brien tells me there are three stages to my reintegration: learning, understanding and acceptance. I am to learn of the second stage. He tells me he had a part in writing The Book and that I understand how the government maintains power but what I don't why the government maintains its power. This is what I must learn to do. He tells me the answer the the question. The Party maintains power solely for the purpose of having power. They have no caring for the welfare of others. O'Brien speaks of a "perfect" society built on hatred and cruelty. This world cannot live on its own, it would self destruct. But O'Brien is witty and will comeback with a remark that leaves me stunned every time. I cannot win. I tell him that the spirit of man will defeat the Party. So he tells me to get up, take my clothes off and look at myself in the mirror. I am hideous, I am missing teeth and I am bruised and scarred everywhere. I would not consider myself a man at all. I am beaten, i am broken to the point of no return. i ask when will I be killed. He told me it may be a long time but he assured me. I will be killed.

Part 3

II.

The days were miserable. I was beaten almost every day but I could not confess until it became too much. But the beatings became less frequent and later, I was moved off into a room where I was strapped to a chair with various dials and O'Brien at my side. I knew this is where we would meet, the place with n darkness. O'Brien gave me a demonstration of the chair's electrical frequency. It was extremely painful but O'Brien said that was only at forty. It could and will go all the way up to one hundred if I don't cooperate. The questioning begins and I tell him what I think but he immediately says what I think is wrong and turns the dial. Finally, he asks what two plus two equals. I say four but he sends a jolt all over my body. He tells me whatever Big Brother believes is true and he believes two plus two equals five therefore, it is true. He repeatedly asks me the same question and no matter what I say is followed by a shock. I say four, it is wrong. I say five, he still shocks me because he knows I don't really think that. I want to believe that two plus two equals five but I am resistant. I simply cannot. I finally answer I don't know and he says that's better. He asks why they would bring me here. I answer to confess and to punish but I am wrong. He says it is to cure any person. But I don't want to be cured. We reach the point where I am able to ask him any question. I ask what is in Room 101. But he simply answers, "You know what is in Room 101." He motioned to the man in the white coat who stuck a needle in my arm and I fell into a deep sleep.

Part 3

I.

I woke up. I had no idea where I was. My best guess was the Ministry of Love because there were no windows whatsoever. I had pains in my stomach which had been there ever since they had thrown me in the van and drove me away. But I was also hungry, I did not know how long I had been in this cell, it could be hours, days, or even weeks. I took a seat in the narrow bench and sat still for hours. Every so often, guards would come and throw a person in the cell with me or order someone to come with them to Room 101. There was a telescreen watching my every move and it would yell at me whenever I made any sudden or unexpected movements. I was trapped. For how long I would be in here, I did not know. But I did know one thing, Room 101 was certain. Then O'Brien came in. I was surprised to see him captured as I am. But he was not forcibly taken like I was, he was part of the Thought Police! I couldn't believe it! Now the guard next to him took his truncheon and beat me on the elbow. I grabbed my elbow in pain. But I knew this was just the beginning of my torture.

Part 2

X.

I had just finished reading the Book and started to relax when the Thought Police came out from behind the picture to take us away. This is Mr. Charrington's fault. He is a part of the Thought Police and he gave us away. We are ordered to stand back to back without touching, but I can still feel Julia shaking. We are whisked away quickly where we are sure to go through torture and confession. I hope Julia will not go through what I will most likely have to.

Part 2

IX.

I received The Book today and read it with Julia at my side. I found it interesting but with little that I didn't already know. The Book only confirmed what I already knew and I know now how the Party controls the people to make them believe what Big Brother wants others to think. I was astounded of Julia's lack of interest on the subject. But now I know what is needed to know and I can act for the Brotherhood.

Part 2

VIII.

Julia and I meet at O'Brien's house and I found that O'Brien could turn off the telescreen. We are totally safe from the Thought Police for half an hour because any longer would seem suspicious. Julia and I are inducted into the Brotherhood after a quick questioning. I realized how far I was willing to go to end the Party. I was willing to steal, murder, die, be captured, etc... I was willing to do anything but separate myself from Julia. I will never do that. Our entrance into the Brotherhood has brought the three of us one step closer to victory over the Party.

Part 2

VII.

I had a dream last night. It was about my sister and mother. I keep trying to remember where they are but I can never find out. Perhaps they are still alive but I doubt it. I told Julia of my dream. She is my only outlet for personal expression. I can tell she does not care about my dreams or my past. It does not matter, she is my new family and I love her like she is family.

Part 2

VI.

There is hope for the Brotherhood after all. There is only one reason O'Brien would give me his address. He wishes to admit me and Julia into the Brotherhood. We must plan to meet with him in his house and further learn of the Brotherhood.

Part 2

V.

My good friend Syme has disappeared. I knew this day would come. He knows too much to be kept around every other average, brainwashed human being in this society. However, Syme's disappearance has phased me little. My life is too perfect to be phased be such a small thing as Syme's disappearance. Julia is my life right now. She and I are creating the perfect life. My fear of the Thought Police is decreasing every day.

Part 2

IV.

The room above Mr. Charrington's shop! That's the perfect place where Julia and I can meet without being watched or heard. There are no telescreens and definitely no hidden microphones. It has a comfortable two person bed and the smell of freedom. I know this is the spot where Julia and I will stay and love each other forever but I still fear the day the Thought Police will come and separate us. I hope this day will never come.

Part 2

III.

Julia and I meet frequently now, only in large crowds though. Oh how I wish I could meet with her alone again, in the spot where we first met. I can't believe I thought she was a part of the thought police. She is perfectly normal, except the love affairs she has had with me and several other Inner Party members. I don't care though. The more people she has had affairs with, the more I love her. I love her rebellious attitude. However, I fear that we are the dead. The dead are free and are allowed to love whoever they want. No one can love in the world today. We are the dead.

Part 2

II.

He name is Julia. And she is nothing like I thought she was. She is against the Party and she wears an anti-sex league sash but it is irrelevant to her. We met in spot where we planned to meet and it was bliss. There were no telescreens watching us and there were no microphones to listen to our conversation. While sitting in the shade together when we came saw a beautiful bird singing its song. The bird amazed me, it was free to do as it pleased and sing its song freely. The bird made me feel like there is nothing in the entire Oceania that can take away our freedom. We are free. Just like that bird.

Part 2

I.

It all started in the middle of the morning when I decided to leave my cubicle to head to the lavatory. I noticed a dark figure coming towards me. It was the dark haired girl. Her right arm was in a sling but it could not be noticed because it was the same color of her overalls. It had been four days since we had met at Mr. Charington's shop. She inched closer until we were about four meters apart. Then, she stumbled, almost flat on her face. I motioned to help her up and I asked her if she was okay. She said her arm only hurt for a second and it would be gone momentarily. She stuck her free hand out and I pulled her up. She said "Thanks Comrade" and walked away. I noticed something in my hand, she had slipped a piece of paper into my hand. As I walked away, I transfered it to my pocket. I did not unfold it because there were telesceens everywhere. I thought of taking it to the water closets and reading it but I dismissed to idea. I walked back to my cubicle and threw paper casually among others. I never stopped thinking about the letter. Only two thoughts occurred to me; she was part of the Thought Police and was going to arrest me. The other thought was that she was a member of the Brotherhood and wanted to make me a member of this organization to defeat Big Brother. After eight minutes of waiting, I unfolded the paper and on it read: I Love You. I was stunned. I had to make sure that the words were actually there. I found it difficult to work for the rest of the day. I had to talk to her to find what time and place we could meet. And possibly my only opportunity to do so was during lunch when she was sitting alone at a table away from a telescreen.

I asked her what time she got out, where we could meet, what signals to use, and what time. We figured out we would meet at Victory Square at nineteen hours. I arrived at Victory Square before the decided time and I wandered around the statue of Big Brother. This is where I found her. She gave me directions to her own secret place where there were no telescreens or hidden microphones. After the discussion, we walked away together, not making eye contact but holding hands.

Part: 1

Dear Journal,

I wake up in the morning in my house at Victory Mansion however, this home gives me anything but a sense of victory. Trapped. Trapped in this society where everyone is equal except Big Brother. My home has portraits of B.B. everywhere, he is always watching us. All the time, except in bed.

I walk outside to go my job at the Department of Truth. I collect letters from a pneumatic tube where I read the newspeak letters, and reveal the truth within them. I hope to show the world that Big Brother is not our savior, he will be the end to our society. He teaches the citizens lies as they grow up, and I expose these lies and attempt to find the truth.

I go to Two Minutes Hate frequently where citizens gather to revolt against a man named Emmanuel Goldstein. I find a seat in the middle rows where I am immediately joined by two others. There's the black haired girl whom I know by looks but not a name. Then there's O'Brien, I have never heard him talk before. But one night, I had a weird dream with him in it. We were the only ones in it, he tells me: "We will meet in the place where there is no darkness." I don't know how to interpret that yet. The Two Minutes Hate is led by Emmanuel Goldstein, a man who was tried, found guilty, and sentenced to death. But somehow, had mysteriously disappeared. And he somehow ended up here. I only do this act to show my hate for the Party as well as Goldstein.

If there is hope, it lies in the proles. But they are too dumb to even have thoughts of revolution. They are the lowest class there is, but they are not restricted by B.B. Only the proles and animals are free from B.B. and the thought police. But the proles have never had anything close to a revolution, just a fight for useless kitchenware. If the only hope is in the proles, then there is no hope at all.

The lottery. The only public event the proles actually pay attention to. I was just listening to a conversation about the lottery among the proles when it hit. A fire bomb, destroying every thing and leaving behind a severed hand and a huge mess to attend to. I came across an old man who I hoped would give me helpful information about life before the revolution. Unfortunately, after a liter of beer no one can be of much help. I found a bit of information in a shop owned by an old Mr. Charington. I had already bought the shiniest piece of corral I had ever seen but Mr. Charington showed me a painting of St. Clemens Church. As I stared at it, he recited an old song. Oranges and lemons, ring the bells of St. Clemens... That's a catchy tune. All the day would have well if I had not felt the presence of the black haired woman following me. I wish I could just take my newly bought coral and beat her to death with it but I could never kill anybody, no matter how much I want to.